BRIT Awards 2014 - An alternative view

I'm sceptical about any music award shows, their legitimacy overall even down to the alleged public voting. Having made this clear, I can't recall ever watching the BRITs on TV to be honest, or really caring much about winners of the awards. I put my hand up to being somewhat of a music snob, not entirely convinced by award shows in general and not often moved by popular chart music. I gave up on commercial radio some time ago, even now listening to Radio6 is getting somewhat repetitive.

So having said that, the last place I imaged I'd be on the evening of February 19th was suited up, with the wife and enjoying the ceremony, live at the O2. Yes you read that right, I was not only there, but I'm also not ashamed to say that I enjoyed it. A lot has to be said about having the wife (certified MILF) in a sexy outfit and ridiculous heels, plus a good few pints to help reach that conclusion, however the live performances certainly sealed the deal.

If I hadn't won tickets (#PricelessSurprises competition on Twitter) for the night I'd have never gotten the chance (read: wanted to) to see the likes of the Arctic Monkeys and Beyonce in the flesh. Beyonce was everything you'd expect and the crowd loved her. The stage was minimally set up, most of the sparkle coming from her dress. I got a glimpse of Prince and 3RDEYEGIRL as they presented Ellie Goulding with Best Female Solo Artist, and an embarrassed (and well out of his comfort zone) Cesc Fabregas alongside Nicole Scherzinger announcing Daft Punk as Best International Group. Nile Rodgers accepted the award on behalf of the robots. Cesc's "I come in peace" couldn't have been more scripted, and it showed. I thought Katy Perry's performance of 'Dark Horse' promised much but was a bit weak, easily overshadowed by Ellie Goulding's spectacle of fire during 'Burn'. Lorde, Disclosure & Aluna George performed 'Royals/White Noise' in a very left field fashion, and it really worked. Bastille and Rudimental's version of 'Pompeii/Waiting All Night' came up short. The evening was concluded with Pharrell & Nile Rodgers playing 'Get Lucky/Good Times/Happy', with the Northern Soul dancers strutting their stuff on stage and in the aisles. Ten thousand balloons fell from the ceiling onto the drunken celebs below in time honoured award show tradition.

I shouldn't forget that David Bowie was awarded Best British Male, thirty years after he last won the prize. In his absence the Kate Moss accepted his award and read out this allegedly controversial speech - "In Japanese myth, the rabbits on my old costume that Kate's wearing live on the moon. Kate comes from Venus, and I from Mars, so that's nice. I'm completely delighted to have a Brit for being the best male... But I am, aren't I, Kate? I think it's a great way to end the day. Thank you very much - and Scotland, stay with us." All I cared about was being in the same room as Kate Moss, albeit a very large room. It allowed me to feel my age, and was retribution for the wife having ogled the One Direction Boys all evening.

Of all the acts, Bruno Mars impressed me the most. He and his band are nothing short of artistes extraordinaire. All done with professionalism, passion and smiles too. I bet this guy never has a moan about anything, just does his job, does it well and goes home happy.

Before the show much was made of it being comedian James Corden's third and final time hosting, and though not a fan I laughed in the right spots. I will actually be interested to see who takes over next year, or maybe not.

After the show much was made of the Arctic Monkeys front man Alex Turner's speech, after receiving Album Of The Year. I can testify that it was less likely to have been off the hip and probably some credit should go to the organisers. The fact that the performance prior to the award presentation involved a ton of stage props that hadn't yet been cleared, even by the time he finished his speech, well you get the idea. Sometimes, shit I'd go as far as saying a lot of the time, even our beloved Rock n' Roll behaviour isn't what it seems.

Oh and being a live show on ITV, the ad breaks made for brief fun placing bets on which celebs could make it to the toilet and back in three minutes (I think Jessie J must be having a poo), but were otherwise boring and tedious.

The less said about the After Party for which I had tickets the better. Think seventies themed office Christmas party, and that's being nice. The VIP party next door was the real place to be. We downed our two free drinks and bounced.

You can see clips of everything from the performances, to acceptance speeches and even back stage interviews via the BRITAwards YouTube page here.

Since finishing this post, the winners of the NME awards have been announced and excuse me for being cynical but this looks to be yet another popularity contest rather than award ceremony. Lily Allen winning Best Solo Artist? She did joke however - "This is kind of dumb because David Bowie was in the same category and Jake Bugg so this goes to you guys, not me." Congrats to the Arctic Monkeys for picking up five awards, they are doing a great job and would be doing so regardless of accolades. A full list of winners, should you care, can be found on the NME website here. Peace.

PS I should just mention, in keeping with such things, my outfit. I wore a slim-fit suit from Next. AMH shirt and pocket square. My shoes were the Lisbon's from the Vivobarefoot hand-cut range. I accessorised with jewellery from The Great Frog and new Persol glasses.